Saturday, 9 April 2016

Unexplained Hiatus

Wow.. the last time I was here, in my blog was in November 2014. It has been almost two years... Blogging has always been one of my favourite thing to do. I started in the year of 2007. Almost everyday I wanted to blog something. I always had something to share and to tell. Even till now I always do.

I have slowly drifted away from my blog as I got distracted with so many other things - fb, instagram, twitter etc. I am also getting lazy in anything related to writing and reading. I am a person that used to love reading so much, and I always had a book/novel with me all the time or before sleep.. now it's the other way round. I found that books that I read are no longer interesting. I found that I am so lazy to blog though I have so many ideas/stories to share.

Why? Could it be the age factor? Hehehehe.. I don't really know but what I know today, at this moment, is that I am back here blogging. One of the strong factors that made me to start again is because of my father... Yes.. my beloved father that I call "Ayah".

Ayah is 73 years old. Recently I went back to visit him. Every time when I visit Ayah, he looks weaker and older. His steps become slower. Ayah is having a mild parkinson and on blood pressure medication. Ayah will easily get tired and will always prefer to lie down or sleep. Ayah now seldom talks but when he talks, he will randomly ask questions that we don't know how to answer. Ayah will suddenly talked about his past like works and friends.

Ayah that I know was a strong and smart man. He worked as a manager at one of BERNAS (used to be known as LPN) branch. I grown up in a few places/branches of LPN complex in Kedah. Ayah managed hundreds of staffs and was well known as a very strict boss! Ayah was active in golf and loved meeting friends. Our house was always full with visitors and relatives who came to visit us.

It's heartbreaking to see my father the total opposite of what he used to be. There are many things that could've stopped the change of my father. First of all, my father shouldn't have stopped golfing. I know very well that he loves golf so much. When he plays golf, he meets friends and they talk and chat which makes him happy. My father used to read the newspaper every morning. That is a must routine for him. One day he told me that he feels lazy to read now and stopped subscribing the newspaper. Most of the time now, my father just stay at home either sleep or sitting down. Now, that is his daily routine.

When I look at him and his friends who are at the same age or older, I feel bad for him. Many of his friends are still healthy and actively driving, exercise and meeting people. Everybody will get old. How you prepare yourself getting old is what you have to start doing now.

I am 47 years old. I do exercise regularly and am conscious on my diet. My daily activity besides doing the routine house chores are hobbies like knitting, sewing, making dolls and watching drama online! I don't read books anymore except for recipe books. I only read news and gossip from fb. (That's so sad right :( )

I want to grow old smart. I want to grow old healthy. I want to be able to talk in whatever topics I can when I grow old. I want to be able to continue doing things that I like.

To be able to achieve all of that, I have to always make my brain work, right? Stimulate my brain.. like writing and blogging- what I'm doing now.

Wow... can't believe that I've typed so many paragraphs. A good start indeed.

I guess I have to stop now as I will continue again in another episode. Welcome back 'vogue mom' and I hope this time it will be continuously active.

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